Basket of Thoughts

Thoughts from my mind to the internet

Welcome back to another story from a family cross country trip across the U.S.A. It was 1990 and I was 8 years old. It only took me 30 fucking years to finally decide to write about my memories from it. Anyways, on to the tale today. I literally do not remember anything from Salt Lake City, Utah other than remembering this experience. It was a warm night and we were getting prepared to eat dinner. We were going to have some pizza that we had gotten from a super market along the trip. Who doesn’t love pizza? I grabbed it hastily from my mom after it was cooked and took a gleeful bite. Almost instantaneously, my joy went to horror as my taste buds registered the toxic taste of styrofoam. Mind you I had never eaten styrofoam but thing about it, is that it has a distinct smell that creates the taste for you. I spit it out and immediately and stated “I can’t eat it this, it tastes like styrofoam.”

My father wasn’t buying it. He thought I didn’t want to eat it because it had green onion and pepper on it and at my age then, I wasn’t a fan and wouldn’t eat it. I pleaded my case and request he try it. He obliged and his reaction was immediate as well. Oh, what the fuck!? was definitely the look on his face, but I didn’t put in quotes because I can’t honestly say I remember his exact words. It wouldn’t surprise me though, if they were. So, let’s be a tale of caution as well. If you ever see pizza and its packaged with styrofoam on the bottom, be cautious because you may suffer the same fate. Blah, thinking of it now I can still taste it. So much so, that this is my sole, solid, memory of Salt Lake City, Utah.

On Tuesday morning of September 11, 2001 I was walking through the dish wash room at work when I foggy brained heard the news on the radio. A plane had hit one of the World Trade Center Towers. Without even a single hesitation a voice in my head said “Oh well, that’s definitely a terrorist attack”. Now, I’m not sure if it had been obvious to everyone at that time but it was my immediate thought.

Now, let’s delve into the night before shall we? I had done what is called candy flipping. It is when you take acid and ecstasy together. I can’t recall much of that night oddly enough, but knowing I had done that the night before makes the events of what was to happen the next day so burned in my mind. I had felt guilty going to work the next day after being fucked up all night. I remember my mushy brain the next morning and feeling numb hearing it. Almost as if it wasn’t really happening. I also, in a sick way, recall thinking, well, maybe we deserved it. Always trying to play the fucking World Police. It wasn’t until actually seeing the footage of the events, where it sunk in and was sobering. Despite how awful that day was. There was some good out of it. There was a period of unity. Unfortunately, it’s something we don’t seem to have at all currently. As I recall that day, I hope that we can rediscover that unity as well. Forgive but never forget.

In the post I wrote before this I had an intro regarding a cross country family trip. I wasn’t sure what direction to take with it. I wanted to write it chronologically but truth be told, I can’t remember the exciting and most memorable things in that order. This first tale I am going to tell is probably for me the memory that sticks in my mind and forever has since I had witnessed it. It was also on of my favorite places we had visited during the trip. We were in Wyoming and staying at a KOA (Kampgrounds Of America). It was also my favorite KOA we had stayed at as well. The wilderness there was beautiful and this was after there had been some wildfires that had done some significant damage throughout the park. I remember just from driving through some of it how amazed I was as an 8 year old kid to see the wildlife we were seeing. We saw a majority of gazelles and antelope. Most amazing to me though were the amount of buffalo we were seeing. In this specific memory. We were going along and saw a few cars pulled over up ahead. That was usually a good indicator that there was something nearby worth checking out. Boy, they were right. We got out of the RV and through the trees probably about a couple hundred feet away were two buffalo battling each other. They charged and butted heads with a thud, locking horns. They grunted and groaned as they battled for dominance until finally, with a thunderous thud one of them was tossed to the ground. I distinctly remember feeling the ground quake under my feet when it hit. The defeated buffalo made no efforts to put up more of a fight and that was the end of the conflict. With nothing left to see and being close enough to be in trouble should they charge, we packed into the RV and continued our trip. It was a memory that still sticks with me to this day. Experiencing the rawness of nature first hand is truly a spectacle to behold.

When I was 8 years old, I was fortunate to be the beneficiary of one of my father’s dreams. That dream being to go on a cross country trip across the United States. My father had been working for himself as a builder for 8 years at that time and had managed to save enough money to make the dream a reality. A while before leaving on the trip he set the gears in motion by purchasing a motor home that was in need of some work. With mechanical skills being a hobby, he made it a passion project. I can’t recall how long it had taken from the time he purchased it until it was ready for the road but it was the summer of 1990 when we set forth on a 5 week journey. My father had written a journal during that trip. Looking back at it now, I wish I had too. I’ve decided that even though it was 30 years ago, I am going to start posting up some memories I still have from that adventure. I’m a fool for not having written about them when I was younger and the memories were more fresh. Better late then never they say. I hope they’re right.

The title says it all. I’ve been a fuckin slacker lately and it eats me up. My car has been in the shop for almost 2 weeks now. The quick backstory on that is I went through an area that was flooded and it needs a new engine. I filed a claim with my insurance for it and insurances being as they are don’t make anything easy so it’s taking longer than it should. It’s frustrating, my wife has been delivering and picking me up from work and on a few days here or there I have taken her car for the duties myself. Therefore, I have not been working out either like I had been. So nothing but slacking from me. I hoping that jumping on today to get back in the practice will start a new trend. I sort of want to change how this blog has been going as well. I feel a majority of it has simply been my rants and raves about shit. I’d like to get away from that and try to add in more stories whether they be stories from my life or fictional. I’ve been pretty aggressive in some shit and at the time truly wrote what I felt. I’m sure it was offensive to some but whatever it is what it is. I want to try to stray away from the absolute shit show and to be curt, evil that is what we know as politics. Nothing but divisiveness and it brings out the worst in people I think. It’s brought out the worst in me. A huge help is trying to distance myself from news altogether. So anyways, hopefully this will start a new trend in hopefully more quality writings. I’m sure there will still be a fair share of rants from time to time but I think I want to focus more on actual story stuff. Hopefully it has a good effect. That’s all for now. Stay safe.

I really do have to apologize for my lack of content lately. I mentioned a couple posts back that life happens. That is still the case but I wasn’t entirely truthful. The truth is I’ve been working on myself a bit lately by deciding to do some serious exercise with my friend Matt. It started off a bit of a gag to surprise my brother for when he comes back from Austria next month. Hopefully that’s still the case and plans haven’t changed for them to come back later, cuz while I may have hated him for the suffocation lock, I still love the bastid and have missed hanging out with him. Another motivation was when Matt goaded me a into it by telling me to stop being a blob fish. If you aren’t aware of what a blob fish is, google it and look at some images. If you see that thing and are feeling overweight, well it’s a hell of a motivator because it’s ugly as fuck. I have to thank him for that because not only are there the physical benefits of it there’s also mental benefits. My wife has stated she has noticed a difference and that I seem happier after a night when I have put in some work. So that’s been the main catalyst of my lack of content. There’s definitely not a lack of content to write about these days so now that I’ve warmed you up with the reason for my recent absence let’s dive in. I’m gonna start with the hoopla of the removal of confederate statues, wanting to do away with the forts named after confederate soldiers, and the banning of the confederate flag. For all the people in support of keeping all the confederate shit, be warned. You may want to stop reading right now because I’m going to blast into you. If you are offended or upset about all that stuff being done away stating ” It’s history! You have to keep it up to remind ourselves of the past so it’s not forgotten!” All I can do is shake my head and call bullshit and call you a fucking idiot at the same time. Open a history book or maybe you should have paid attention in school. Did you ever recall learning about WWII and Nazi Germany? Do you ever recall a swastika flag and what it looks like? Of course you do. Did I see any swastika flags when I was in Germany? NO! But we still learned about that in history didn’t we? So, your thought on it possibly being lost history has been proven false. Maybe instead, you’re a higher level up. Maybe, it’s your Southern Pride which is why you defend to keeping the flag. Well, don’t try to say you aren’t a racist because that confederate flag resembles the traitors that were willing to fight America to keep being racist. So not only are you defending racism you are defending being a traitor. I’m going to go on a limb and say you probably are in high support of the current fascist in office. Which leads me directly into the uproar about Antifa. Last I knew Antifa stood for anti-fascist. To me, that sounds like something we should be for that is of course you think Nazi Germany was cool and want to bring it to America? In that case you deserve to keep your confederate flag because you have proven yourself to be a traitor. To be honest, that’s how America was founded so it’s all fitting in a strange way. While I love America, I don’t like a majority of the dirty history of it. Therefore, I say burn all the civil war memorial shit. Trust me, people will still learn about it another hundred years from now even without statues or flags. History has shown I’m right because last I knew people still know about it and write about it. It’s not statues that distinguish history. It’s the archives of written documentation. Unless, something like 1984 happens then I’ll be right. The scary thing is, 1984 seems more like fact sometimes than fiction. To be honest I don’t care if I am right about that. I just care for what is right to be done. I think getting rid of that stuff is the right thing to do. That’s all I got for now.

Today I found myself listening to a podcast I stumbled on upon called Bedtime Stories. This podcast features short stories of the unexplained. Aliens, UFOS, Cryptids, stuff like that. It made me think of a time that my friend Todd and I talked about over the weekend. We went camping to a place we like to go. Pawtuckaway Park in New Hampshire. It started out as any other time we had gone. We were drinking beer, smoking weed, and hanging out on the peak where we can look out over the park.

It’s a great view and we have seen fireworks from miles away before. We saw a satellite fly over one night and wouldn’t even had known had it not been coincidentally mentioned on the radio we were listening to at the moment. There have been some magical experiences up there and this particular story is one of them.

There is a fire pit that is a small embankment down from the peak. For some reason we decided to start a small fire. We got it going and didn’t think much of it. We went back up to the peak and it was pitch black at this time. I can’t recall the time but it was summer so I would guess it was at least 10 P.M. We were looking out across the land and we could see some headlights driving on one of trails way out in the distance across the pond. Then out of nowhere a bright, ball of light was shining on us. Almost as it were a spotlight shining on us but at the same time it was at around the same level or slightly higher then us. We were like what fuck at first. Then out of paranoia it struck my mind it was coming from the fire tower. Panicked we jumped down the embankment to put the fire out and I couldn’t help but notice that the bright light shined across the peak and over us as we crouched. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a light as bright as that in my life. I had never had a fire tower spot light on me either so our panic was just that we were going to get in trouble. Possibly arrested if they were to come up and find us. We went back and just went to the tent to go to sleep. Worried at any moment we would see flashlights and officials to get us out of there. No one ended up coming and we were able to get some sleep. When we woke up we went back to the peak to take a last look out over the park before we left. While up there I looked for the fire tower. It was way off to the left on the other side and in no way could have been the source of light that shined on us. Now I’ve tried to think of logical things on what the light was or where it came from but I had nothing when I realized how far away the fire tower was. I thought maybe it was a spot light coming from the vehicle that we had seen. I don’t think it was that either because the strange thing about the light was that it was a ball and there really wasn’t any beam to trace it’s origin. It’s something I have never had an answer to and neither has Todd. I guess it makes it our unsolved mystery.

It’s been awhile. I really didn’t mean to neglect my blog but needless to say life happens. I’m here and at it again though. Hitting the keys and about to get shit off my chest. I’m really hoping come November we don’t have another 4 years of this fuckin asshole. Him alone infuriates me. I hated him before he became “President”. Him taking office only inflated his ego and even worse he has a herd of fuckin sheep that support him regardless of anything he does. Including the blatant bullshit that he can’t ever back up. It’s always “I’ve heard stories”. Well guess what, here’s a story for you fuck face. Doc Brown and Marty Mcfly go back in time, capture John Wilkes Boothe, bring him back to the present and he blows Trump’s brains out and finally Trump has a half truth with him being like Lincoln. Seriously though, I wouldn’t shed a single tear if that motherfucker got knocked off. I’d consider it a good deed for humanity personally. America would really be winning then. It’s not winning as of now with 100,000 + deaths from this virus. I’m not saying that the virus is his fault. If I was, then I might as well be a Trump supporter because that’s just a moronic thing to do. Yes, if you are Trump, dick riding supporter, I called you a moron and I’m not going to apologize. As a matter of fact I’m doubling down. I’m gonna say fuck you and you can move on to another blog for all I care because to be truthful I don’t. There are zero leadership qualities about this man and he is an embarrassment to the U.S. This pandemic has shown how weak he is at leading. Simply by refusing to take it seriously and stating it’s going to go away like a miracle to constantly stating how the death toll would be higher if he had done nothing. Well, that’s the problem you did do nothing very early on and thus we are so far behind. He makes big claims about stopping travel from China. Whoopty fuckin doo, you really only prevented Chinese people coming over from China. Americans over there were still allowed to come back. Were they not going to carry it because they lived in America?? Bottom line is this dip shit has to go. I’m not saying Biden is a great choice either but I’d rather him than deal with 4 more years of narcissism and lack of accountability. I know I’m not the only one that sees that the guy is all too willing to pat himself on the back about something but anything negative is someone else’s fault. That just shows the lack of character he has. He is just a hollow body bag constantly spewing bile and I’ve grown all too sick of it.

I was just randomly thinking about things and I reverted back to my 6th grade English class. In class we were divided into small groups and we had to look things up in the dictionary. I believe we were looking up words and putting them into sentences or something like that. I was in a group with my friend Ryan and a kid that was new to me. I think he had been in the school for about a year already but we hadn’t had classes together until then. We had started to become friendly mainly due to working together and getting to know each other from that. I tend to be weary of new people until I get to know them. He decided to really test things out on this particular day. Thwack! He smacked me in the back of the head with dictionary as he walked by. He was a sneaky bastard doing that and he had this teacher wrapped around his finger. Enraged, I jumped up shoving my desk over causing an obvious scene. “Nathan!” she yelled at me. I tried to plead my case but when she asked him he just sort of shrugged his shoulders. Apparently that was a sign of innocence and she just chastised me for being unruly. I don’t recall her sending me to the principal but I was definitely rebuked. It’s always the reactor not the reactee that gets in trouble. Needless to say, it was the icebreaker to the best relationship I’ve had outside of my family in my life. I suppose the silly act of violence was a symbol of brotherhood. I do consider him a brother as well. I think my family wouldn’t hesitate to agree that he is family as well. As a matter of fact there were times while growing up I felt my parents would’ve preferred him over me. He is an amazing person and I’m fortunate that I’ve been able to be in his life as much as I have. I can’t blame my parents if they ever thought that and I can’t blame Mrs. Humphries (Humphreys?) for him being the pet. He’s an amazing dude and he’s always been a person that I’ve admired. We’ve had amazing memories together up till now and I can’t wait to build on them again when we have the chance.

There’s too much information out there these days and there’s a piece for every slant and view you can think of. That being said, it boils down to what sources can you really trust? I really just don’t know. The sides are so divided now that it doesn’t take a genius to see that there are specific news stations that portray their side to what they want you to see. It falls easily into ears of those that also see things from that side, right or left. Therein lies the danger. I’m constantly on the lookout for the truth and I feel a lot of other people try to be as well. However, many still stick to the news that pacifies them and they like to continue that trend. If you go to the other station they have complete opposite stories to support their agendas therefore the left stays with left news and right goes right. Where is the middle? If you read my blog you see I bring it up in many of my posts when I write about political stuff. I just want to know what’s real. I find myself guilty of sticking to the same news station that typically steers toward what I would prefer to be reliable but does tend to slant left. My reasoning for this is because I do know that Trump is a pathological liar. Not even a good one at that. He just blows off his lies and piles on more. I was listening to a video of him talking today and I was paying attention and flat out heard him lie by saying something completely opposite from what he had said in the first place. The sad thing is he does it all the time and there are people that think he’s the best. There’s no talking any sense into the Trumpers either. Yet, somehow they like to call the opposing side, sheep. Ok, we’re sheep but you’re blindly following a dude that blatantly lies about everything. Gotcha’ pal, you keep on winning you true patriot, you. It drives me fucking insane. I was talking with a friend of mine about it a few weeks ago and I’ve come to the same conclusion as he has. They’re fucking fascists. They truly are. Now, I say this strictly because I do know for a fact Trump is full of shit. They are the only people that say otherwise. Those “fake news” stories tend to be on the right side agenda from what I have observed. Any station that twist around and supports blatant lies I’ve heard with my own ears can’t be credible to me. However, there are stories I read from the right that make me think differently and then I find a news story that debunks it from the left. I just don’t know anymore. All I do know is Trump is a liar and those that blindly follow him are fascists. That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

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